Inspired by a story

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So I lay in a pool of my own blood

The steady drop of it oneness with my heartbeat

Crimson red or tomato red I can’t say

Forgive me for my color blindness

At least now I can blame it on the loss of blood

They say when you’re about to die

Your life flash before you

But all I can hear is your voice

Repeatedly ,over and over

Like a broken record

Congratulation your wish is about to come true

Damm you cuz you cant even let this moment pass

I still as I  hear your voice in my head

You were the only one to ever scale the walls

I was surprised

But more surprised that you wanted to stay

When you started talking of the beauty outside

And I began to wonder what it was like

I got scared

When I started wishing to see it

I decided

You had to go

Now I hear you like I did the day I made you leave

Telling me one day if I don’t bring down my tower of thorns

Pricking anyone that dares come close

One day people will stop trying

And I’ll lay dying in my castle and nobody will help

Cuz  nobody will know and even if they do

They wouldn’t care

Well smartass

You were right

Silence ……..

 

 

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MORE EMOTION THAN BLOOD

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Sunday, July 24, 2016  7:33 PM

I like John Bellion ,I think he gets it

I like Sia ,I think she feels it

I like Ed Sheeran I think he’s already conquered

I grieve for Paul Walker ,I think he went too soon

And the song “See you again” by Wiz Whalifa?

Brings me almost to tears

I like Eminem I think he’s mastered how to use words

Am not good with talking about my emotions

Most time I don’t even understand them

And when I do?

I don’t think anybody else will

So I when I hear songs I can relate to

It lights my heart ablaze

I love the Words from the Lord

It gives me freedom and ignites the fire in me

I think am more emotion than blood

And it makes everything so damm hard

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Random log 03.07.2016

​3pm

Time I Made it out of my room (cuz I woke up late which was because I Slept late again  (sorry  mum) but not as late as the usuals so yeeeh to mama bear) after doing  devotion, planning and some chores. Prepared to feed the chicken so I Poured food&water and went to set it down but the contents slouched out cuz I dropped it too quickly because I was scared of him/her pecking me. At the less than graceful delivery the chicken looked at me and the Bible verse I read earlier on about wisdom came to my mind  but cuz am the higher mammal I refused to take the bait  (and the chicken now demoted to it)  I  thought to ‘I See what you’re doing but am not going to bite’. Before I finish the telepathic communication the chicken was already pecking at it’s food leaving me to wonder if I had imagined the whole exchange. Chicken 1 Human 0, it is on Elena(yes am calling the chicken Elena now cuz the real Elena broke my heart when she Left  Stephen for Damon even though we love Damon, in case you’re wondering am talking about Vampire Diaries)
6:00pm

Hehehehe So my brother Finally accepts his little baby is all grown up and wants to have the talk hehehehe unfortunately there’s nothing to talk about but I might just play along and watch him struggle (did I mention I love my family? )

Soul searching 

Am caught between two dimensions. I rise from one but can’t help but appreciate the other. I love the later for it’s simplicity and straightforwardness and the formal for it’s bindings. I Can’t go strictly for one cuz it both got flaws so I merge the two  and make something better but at a price. The price is not fitting in at either, the result is best of the two, flaws of the two and loneliness. Is the result and price  worth the process though, a little too late for the questions cuz the process started long ago. Click goes the final nail of the coffin, nothing is permanent so steps could always be retraced but the current path is alluring and it’ll be rad if no correction is needed. More than the thirst for the allure is the heart squeezing burn for the perfect will of the Highest and for that everything can be forfeited because nothing would be in the first place if not for.
9pm

Soul searching is good but even better  is my meal for the night, can still feel the taste on my tongue.
11:50pm

We didn’t forget you, your word was important but we don’t want to talk about  it, don’t wanna think about it.  

Call

We call it an eye opening day, how was yours? You can tell us we won’t tell anybody. Well maybe Jane (from Jane the Virgin) (that’s what we’re calling the  morning pages book) 

Music 

Wolves by One direction